First Sermon
All praises are for Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ). We praise Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) with the deepest of gratitude for the unity and for the blessings He has provided us. All praise after praise is for Him Alone. Oh our Lord! We hope for the reward on the Day of Judgement. I bear witness that there is none other worthy of worship than Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) and He has no partners. This is a testimony that illuminates the soul with the brightest of light and that the seven skies are lighted with this truth.
I bear witness that our Prophet, Muhammad ﷺ was sent with the most noble of Shari’ah which is established for all place and time. May my mother and father be sacrificed for him ﷺ. The Prophet ﷺ was pure with regards to lineage and nobility. May Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ)’s blessings be upon him ﷺ. He ﷺ invited to unity and warned of divorces. Salutations and blessings be sent upon him ﷺ and his noble family who are above and beyond all. The Companions of the Prophet ﷺ (May Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) be pleased with them all), are those who guided towards the right path through their sound knowledge. They reached heights with their insight. Then the pious predecessors were those who followed the Companions with truth hoping for Jannah
After this!
O Servants of Allah! Fear Allah and know this is the strengthening factor. Adopting taqwa is what will enlighten the darkness around you. So the one who has strongly held on to this, will be the one who will attain success. By Allah! He will be the one who has tasted the sweetness of purity.
Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) says in the Qur’an:
يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ اتَّقُوا رَبَّكُمُ الَّذِي خَلَقَكُم مِّن نَّفْسٍ وَاحِدَةٍ وَخَلَقَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا وَبَثَّ مِنْهُمَا رِجَالًا كَثِيرًا وَنِسَاءً ۚ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ الَّذِي تَسَاءَلُونَ بِهِ وَالْأَرْحَامَ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلَيْكُمْ رَقِيبًا
O mankind, fear your Lord, who created you from one soul and created from it its mate and dispersed from both of them many men and women. And fear Allah, through whom you ask one another, and the wombs. Indeed Allah is ever, over you, an Observer.
[An-Nissa: 1]
Oh Muslims! A universal issue faced by many families today for which the Shariah has given an appropriate solution that is unique in its course. The solution for this problem can only be solved by those who are knowledgeable and are of detailed understanding and possessors of exemplary characteristics. This is an issue that brings the highest and most noblest of families to a barren vast land. It causes anxiety and grief. It leads to separation and sadness. The grief hovers around families for many days, months and years. It has caused many united people to disperse and many eyes to shed tears. It has led many happy households who were connected together with joy to a place of misery and devastation. May Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) protect us all. This is the issue of divorce and separation.
Oh Muslims! The divorce rate has increased in the current day and age. For many, divorce has been carried out on the smallest of matter. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) has warned people to not be quick in divorce.:
وَتِلْكَ حُدُودُ اللَّهِ ۚ وَمَن يَتَعَدَّ حُدُودَ اللَّهِ فَقَدْ ظَلَمَ نَفْسَهُ ۚ لَا تَدْرِي لَعَلَّ اللَّهَ يُحْدِثُ بَعْدَ ذَٰلِكَ أَمْرًا
And those are the limits [set by] Allah. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah has certainly wronged himself. You know not; perhaps Allah will bring about after that a [different] matter.
[At-Talaq: 1]
Husbands and Wives! The two of you are esteemed partners. You are both caretakers of families. Love and kindness has been kept between the two so relationships can last. Hence, Islam has elevated the rank of marriage as it combines and unifies not only two individuals but two families into a strong growing bond. Moreover, there is an environment of care and warmth within the house. It is not a place of arguments and fights. It is a promise between the husband and wife as is stated in the Qur’an:
وَقَدْ أَفْضَىٰ بَعْضُكُمْ إِلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَأَخَذْنَ مِنكُم مِّيثَاقًا غَلِيظًا
And they have taken from you a solemn covenant?
[An-Nissa: 21]
It is supposed to be a strong connection which is not to be easily broken. Hence, the maintaining of families is incumbent in Islam. Islam advocates love, peace and understanding through this relationship and drives away fear, hatred and harshness. It is a bond of unity and extension of kindness. It is the use of soft words that melts people’s hearts and brings smiles to their faces. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) has stated that one of His signs is that He has created from amongst you pairs so you find peace in them. What the Qur’an says about this relationship is:
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَٰلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.
[Ar-Rum: 21]
Believers! Respected husbands and respected wives, know that a pure and sincere matter rests upon patience and a beautiful relationship. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) states:
وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ۚ فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًا
And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.
[An-Nissa: 30]
A hadith says: Abu Hurairah (RadiaAllahu Anhu) reported, Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said,
“The believers who show the most perfect Faith are those who have the best behaviour, and the best of you are those who are the best to their wives.”
(At-Tirmidhi)
O Servants of Allah! It is in human nature to be emotional, to make mistakes and to follow corruption. Hence the boundaries of Islam caters to curb the problems, prevents the anticipated issues in a relationship to prevent it from harm through the rules set out. The complete individual is the one who does most tawbah (repents) and is cautious of the boundaries set by Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ). As it is stated in the Qur’an:
ذَٰلِكَ وَمَن يُعَظِّمْ حُرُمَاتِ اللَّهِ فَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَّهُ عِندَ رَبِّهِ
That [has been commanded], and whoever honors the sacred ordinances of Allah – it is best for him in the sight of his Lord
[Al-Hajj: 30]
At times, even the best of families undergo a severe storm which breaks their unity and creates a ground of differences and separation. The worst factor that leads to any of this is anger. Anger leads to destruction.
Anger is like an earthquake for families. Rashness is fatal. Patience is the savior and the pillar of them both. The worst of lives belong to those who are the most reactive in nature and resort to anger for all affairs. The saddest of all matters is that instead of a couple trying to resolve their issues together, they feel that the solution lies in a divorce. They insist on being separated, yet there may still be a way. We have been described of human nature and specifically that of a women. It is stated in a hadith narrated by Imam Bukhari and Imam Muslim in their Sahi’ain that:
Abu Huraira (RadiaAllahu Anhu) reported: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said,
“I enjoin you to treat women well, for the woman was created from a rib and the most curved part of the rib is its highest point. If you try to straighten it, you will break it. If you leave it as it is, it will remain bent. Thus, I enjoin you to be good to women.”
(Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 3153, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 1468)
O Husbands and their wives! Please do not hasten to divorce. It shakes up the skeleton of both the nuclear as well as the extended families involved. A divorce given in haste not only affects the husband and wife but deeply affects the children in that marriage. The affect is further faced by society as a whole. Islam has, therefore, discouraged divorce and kept it as a last resort.
So those advocating divorce and those entering it without considering the dire consequences of it, think before you act. It is an act that desires coolness from fire and expecting sweet water from barren land. It is nothing but a daydream. So wake up and may Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) save you from the vices of the dreamland you live in.
Many a families have fallen from heights to swamps of problems due to divorce. Islam has advocated ways to work out marital issues. Before you consider divorce, consider this:
وَإِنِ امْرَأَةٌ خَافَتْ مِن بَعْلِهَا نُشُوزًا أَوْ إِعْرَاضًا فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْهِمَا أَن يُصْلِحَا بَيْنَهُمَا صُلْحًا ۚ وَالصُّلْحُ خَيْرٌ ۗ وَأُحْضِرَتِ الْأَنفُسُ الشُّحَّ ۚ وَإِن تُحْسِنُوا وَتَتَّقُوا فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ خَبِيرًا
And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them – and settlement is best. And present in [human] souls is stinginess. But if you do good and fear Allah – then indeed Allah is ever, with what you do, Acquainted.
[An-Nissa: 128]
In a hadith narrated by Abu Huraira (RadiAllahu Anhu) has said that the Prophet ﷺ:
No believing man should hold a grudge against a believing woman. If there is a habit that he does not like within her, there will be something else that pleases him.
This hadith is an advice and provides insightful wisdom for forgiveness and overlooking of faults between the husband and wife. It advocates goodness, And there is no man that is perfect and has never made a mistake in his life. Through this advice, a mutual love and respect is maintained and understanding replaces anger. This is what brings families and hearts together.
By Allah! If hearts were not filled with love, they will be empty vessels. It is the love in our hearts that bring out our feelings of care and kindness for each other.
O Brothers in Deen! When the boat of marriage gets rocky, it is important that the control be given to the people of understanding after knowing the Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) is the Knower of the unseen. These people can manage intense situations and bring it to some order. One person who is intelligent and wise from each side of the family i.e husband and wife should consult each other. There may be many out there wanting to help but not all can actually help the situation at hand, rather they can worsen it. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) says in the Qur’an:
وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ شِقَاقَ بَيْنِهِمَا فَابْعَثُوا حَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهِ وَحَكَمًا مِّنْ أَهْلِهَا إِن يُرِيدَا إِصْلَاحًا يُوَفِّقِ اللَّهُ بَيْنَهُمَا ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيمًا خَبِيرًا
And if you fear dissension between the two, send an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from her people. If they both desire reconciliation, Allah will cause it between them. Indeed, Allah is ever Knowing and Acquainted [with all things].
[An-Nissa: 35]
If it seems that the current situation is heading towards a place of peace and compromise, then the wife should not insist on a divorce. In a hadith we learn:
If a woman desires divorce from her husband without a reason, she will be prohibited from the smell of Jannah.
(Musnad Ahmad/ Abu Dawood)
O the Muslim Ummah! O Parents! O Husbands and Wives! There are times when it becomes very difficult to avoid the fire of divorce as the life without divorce can be a difficult one also. Hence, Islam has considered this disliked aspect as permissible stating in the Qur’an:
وَإِن يَتَفَرَّقَا يُغْنِ اللَّهُ كُلًّا مِّن سَعَتِهِ ۚ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ وَاسِعًا حَكِيمًا
But if they separate [by divorce], Allah will enrich each [of them] from His abundance. And ever is Allah Encompassing and Wise.
[An-Nissa: 130]
Believers! The reason for the increased divorce rate is the lack of understanding of reconciliation. People fall prey to their viewpoint and ego. They want the upperhand and forget the longer gain or loss for that matter. They neglect to hear what is being said due to arrogance and anger. They resort to injustice many times and desire to take revenge for their hurt. Trust is jeopardized and gossip is spread without verification.
A person may not rush to divorce, but in his thoughts has already pre-decided that he does not want to make the relationship work. He gives into his emotions and foregoes his rationale. This is also a form of hastening to divorce and not giving the situation time to settle or be correctly analyzed. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ)’s help is sought.
O Husbands! O Wives! Control your nafs. Fear Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) with regards to your homes, children and society.
O Wives! Fear Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) with regards to your husbands. Become a comfortable shade for him, and he will become a comfortable covering for you. Speak with a place of softness and satisfaction. Listen well and follow with kindness and live your lives together. For as long as you keep respecting him, he will return with mutual respect and much more love to offer.
A hadith states:
Anas (Radhiallaahu Anhu) reported that the Prophet ﷺ said,
“If a woman prays her 5 daily prayers, fasts her month (i.e Ramadhan), guards her private parts and obeys her husband, she will enter paradise from any of its gates that she wishes.”
(Sahih Al-Bukhari)
O Blessed Husbands! Fear Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) with regards to your wife. Become wise and prudent like the one who cares for his family. Be not like the one who is always looking for faults in his wife and attempting to reprimand her always. Be gentle and loving towards her. Let her offer the same for you. In times of hardship and problems, be there for her and be her support.
We pray to Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) that He gives us the tawfique to be able to implement all these acts which He likes and is pleased with. May He protect us from all those acts which He forbids. May He guide our hearts and illuminate our ways. May He fulfill what we desire. He is the Maalik and the One Who Overpowers.
I say this and seek forgiveness from Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) from all my sins. May Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) give us the ability to follow the Qur’an and the way of the Prophet ﷺ that will only benefit us. Seek forgiveness from Him and repent. Surely my Rabb is Oft-Forgiving.
Second Sermon
All praises are for Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) Alone – the One who has blessed us with a variety of blessings. I bear witness that there is no other worthy of worship than Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ). He is One. He has no partners nor equal. This is a testimony that is upon truth and one that leads us to be forever grateful. I bear witness that our Prophet ﷺ is the most noble in character and way from amongst all mankind. He is the most respected. May the blessings of Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) descend upon him and upon his pious family and children, and upon his companions who were enveloped with the fear of Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ). May the blessings of Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) descend upon the pious predecessors and all those who are upon the truth and true guidance, seeking the closeness of Ar-Rahman. May blessings be upon all above mentioned till the Day of Judgment.
After this
O Servants of Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ). Adopt taqwa as it is what fills the hearts with mercy and light. It brings families together by purifying them. It is essential for husbands to know and understand the rulings for divorce. Divorce has to be carried forth with good treatment. The Qur’an states:
الطَّلَاقُ مَرَّتَانِ ۖ فَإِمْسَاكٌ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌ بِإِحْسَانٍ
Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment.
[Al-Baqara: 229]
Good treatment includes that no injustice is done without the intention to be pleased by hurting the other party or taking revenge upon them. This also includes, to provide for the children in the best appropriate manner without holding back any of their rights. Good treatment, importantly includes forgiving of each others’ faults. Do not indulge in what happened in the past.
From a deeper understanding of divorce, we learn that there are two types of divorces:
- Sunnat (The prescribed way)
- Bid’at (Innovation)
Sunnat (The prescribed way)
This is when a man intends to divorce the wife and carries it forward in the manner prescribed. The woman at the time of divorce is to be pure (not in menstruation) and is given a divorce once after which there is no reconciliation or a husband/wife relationship is formed.
If the husband follows this method, then this divorce is correct and under the Sunnah way. This is what the Shari’ah has prescribed.
Bid’at (Innovative Way)
This occurs when a husband pronounces divorce to the wife multiple times in one sitting. Or he says, “I divorce you three times.” If the woman is in a condition of menstruation is also a case of Bid’at Divorce. Another case of Bid’at Divorce is that if marital relations have been carried out and then she is divorced immediately after.
The man who divorces under these circumstances is sinful. He has not followed the correct methodology of divorce.
Those who are going through the process of divorce or have already gone through this ordeal, be patient. Divorce is not the end of the world. The ways of the world is still open to you and In Sha’Allah, Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) has a better plan for you. Those around the people who have been divorced are to play a key role in bringing comfort to the families and divorcees at this time. It is one of the greatest forms of attaining a reward to be there for such people in this time of need. Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) will rectify the affairs for all individuals as is stated in the Qur’an:
وَمَن يَتَّقِ اللَّهَ يَجْعَل لَّهُ مَخْرَجًا
And whoever fears Allah – He will make for him a way out
[At-Talaq: 2]
May Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) have mercy upon us all.
And send durud on the one who is above and beyond all people. He is above in rank from all families, children and from the Companions. We send such blessings that can fragrant musk as is stated in the Qur’an:
إِنَّ اللَّهَ وَمَلَائِكَتَهُ يُصَلُّونَ عَلَى النَّبِيِّ ۚ يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا صَلُّوا عَلَيْهِ وَسَلِّمُوا تَسْلِيمًا
Indeed, Allah confers blessing upon the Prophet, and His angels [ask Him to do so]. O you who have believed, ask [Allah to confer] blessing upon him and ask [Allah to grant him] peace
[Al-Ahzab: 56]
O Allah, confer blessings upon Your Prophet ﷺ and become pleased with the Four Caliphs, Abu Bakr, Umar, Uthman, Ali and all those who follow closely in their footsteps. O Kareem, O Wahab.
O Allah! Grant Islam and the Muslims prestige and honor.
O Allah! Let Islam prevail and help the Muslims. Debase shirk and the Mushrikeen. Destroy the enemies of Islam.
O Allah! Grant peace and security to this country. Make it a place of understanding, comfort and unity. Grant the same to all Muslim countries.
O Allah! We ask only of no more than Your blessings upon us. Protect us from what we do not ask of You.
O Allah! Grant the Servant of the Two Holy Masjid the ability to perform only those deeds by which You are pleased.
O Allah! Grant their children the ability to perform righteous deeds. Grant them steadfastness in those deed.
O Allah! Help Palestine and the people of Palestine. Protect them.
O Allah! Grant us the best of both the worlds and save us from the punishment of the hellfire.
O Servants of Allah! Allah (عَزَّوَجَلَّ) commands you to do justice, to adhere to the ties of kinship and stay away from indecency and disobedience.
Taken from Jumu’ah Khutbah
Khateeb: Shaykh Abdur Rahman As Sudais (Hafizullah)
24 Safar 1443 (October 1st, 2021)
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