Today the world speaks of psychology and its components in making relationships work. Whereas, several thousands of years ago lived a role model that implemented psychology through his conduct and dealings with those around him. The life of the Holy Prophet (SAW) emphasized mercy, restraint, discipline and sabr (patience). In this article I will offer five examples from the life of the Holy Prophet ﷺ about the wisdom and psychology he practiced. Our Prophet ﷺ possessed these characteristics that made his friends and foe reach out to him.
- Physical and Mental Health:
Islam values the importance of physical, mental health and emotional wellbeing. The Qur’an can be used as a guide to those suffering from emotional distress and aims to lead people to a meaningful quality of life.
Narrated Abu Hurairaرضی اللہ عنہ, the Prophet (ﷺ) said,
مَا أَنْزَلَ اللَّهُ دَاءً إِلاَّ أَنْزَلَ لَهُ شِفَاءً
“There is no disease that Allah has created, except that He also has created its treatment.”
(Sahih Bukhari: Hadith No 5678)
(2) Smiling
Smiling conquers the hearts. Hazrat Abu Dharr رضی اللہ عنہreported, what the Holy Prophet (ﷺ) said about smiling:
لاَ تَحْقِرَنَّ مِنَ الْمَعْرُوفِ شَيْئًا وَلَوْ أَنْ تَلْقَى أَخَاكَ بِوَجْهٍ طَلْقٍ
Don’t consider anything insignificant out of good things even if it is that you meet your brother with a cheerful countenance.
(Sahih Muslim: Hadith 2626)
It is narrated by Hazrat Abu Dharrرضی اللہ عنہ that the Holy Prophet ﷺ said:
“Your smiling in the face of your brother is charity.”
(Tirmidhi, Kitab-ul-Bir wal-Selh).
Smiling is a remedy and is a way to change the hearts of people. So we can say The Holy Prophet ﷺ had the best code of conduct in place. Smiling at the appropriate occasions were a part of his ﷺ’s personality.
*Please note that this smiling is not for non-mahram men if a woman is implementing this sunnah!
(3) A Positive Attitude
Positivity makes the society a better place to live in. The Holy Prophet (ﷺ) advised the Ummah:
Abu Hurairah (رَضِيَ ٱللَّٰهُ عَنْهُ) said, the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said,
إياكم والظن، فإن الظن أكذب الحديث
“Beware of suspicion, for suspicion is the worst of false tales.”
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
This Hadīth warns against negative assumption and suspicion that are not based on evidence, such that one relies on mere assumption and suspicion and judges accordingly.
(4) Wisdom in Dawah
Dawah is a sacred mission and obligation and was also the mission of prophets. It has a strong relation about human’s psychology and comprehension.
Narrated Anas bin Malik (رَضِيَ ٱللَّٰهُ عَنْهُ), the Holy Prophet ﷺ said about it.
يَسِّرُوا وَلاَ تُعَسِّرُوا، وَبَشِّرُوا وَلاَ تُنَفِّرُوا
“Facilitate things to people (concerning religious matters), and do not make it hard for them and give them good tidings and do not make them run away (from Islam).
( Sahih Bukhari: Hadith No 69)
If the preacher fails to take into account people’s background, tastes, moods and their feelings and emotions, then the chances of people listening to his words are very low.
(5) A Good Listener
The Holy Prophet (ﷺ) also expressed the importance of listening when passing judgment. Hazrat Ali رضی اللہ عنہ narrates:
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said to me,
إِذَا تَقَاضَى إِلَيْكَ رَجُلاَنِ فَلاَ تَقْضِ لِلأَوَّلِ حَتَّى تَسْمَعَ كَلاَمَ الآخَرِ فَسَوْفَ تَدْرِي كَيْفَ تَقْضِي
‘When two men come to you seeking judgment, do not judge for the first until you have heard the statement of the other. Soon you will know how to judge.’” Ali said, “I did not err since then.”
(Tirmidhi: 1331)
We need to inculcate these traits within us to win over people and better our relationships. In Sha’Allah.